Stop Searching, Start Doing [and live in a mud hut].

Procrastination.

Whenever I have a list of things to do, I instinctively don't do them. If I get one item crossed off of my list of one-hundred things to do that day, I consider myself accomplished.

And then I procrastinate. Distract myself. Think. Get worried. Seek peace. Try to remember that I'm still young.

All that good stuff.

Since I've been home, I've been finding myself getting distracted by future possibilities. Things like school, future ministry options, non-profit organizations, travel, and what the heck I'm supposed to do with my life. Oh yeah, and I should probably get married someday, too.

And buy a house.

And get a dog.

And have children.

But mostly, I've been looking at what I can do right NOW. Do I REALLY want to go to school? Do I REALLY have to?

-Can I just sell everything, live in a mud-hut, and help people with the abilities that I already have?
-Can I just jump in an organization in Michigan and help people, start a career there, and become a "big-wig" of a non-profit?
-Can I just travel around, following an organization like Operation Blessing or Samaritan's Purse and volunteer for disaster relief? Maybe end up with a job at either organization?
-Can I search for job-openings at Christian counseling centers like Bethany Christian Services, and simply get hired, without a degree (or debt)?

I feel like I just talked myself into needing a degree to do something that I would love to do (having a background in counseling or ministries would be important I guess). But then I'll be far behind the rest of my class, and sinking in debt. But that's okay, and completely normal these days, right?? (Sorry, Mr. Dave Ramsey)

I guess the point is that I'm ready to move from stagnant "searching" for organizations to work with, schools to attend, and places to travel, and take action in finding an organization to work with, moving toward a degree, and going somewhere (apart from my random traveling excursions).

The only thing holding me back is the fear of not doing the "right" thing at the "right" time, and missing out on other possibilities.
[Lord, have mercy on my Dutch perfectionism.]

I'm just ready to make the most of this life, and stop wasting my days pondering the possibilities. That's all!
[Lord, help me now!]

P.S. The title "Stop Searching, Start Doing" refers to the searching of organizations and possibilities, and putting them into action. Realistically, the title could also be "Start Searching, Stop Doing" when it comes to searching/seeking God now, and taking "pause" in other areas of life. Just thought I'd throw that in there.

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."
Psalm 37:4